Rick Santorum is DISGUSTED!

I knew it wouldn’t be long before the Republican Purity Patrol was on the case! Is leather-clad lesbians bumping and grinding for cash much less weird than bringing your dead fetus home, having your children sing to it, and cradling it while you sleep? Oh well, to each his own, I suppose. In Rick’s defense, at least it wasn’t some sicko bestiality club in Tijuana or something because then we would have a reason to oppose gay marriage! Wait, what?

Sorry. Sometimes all those contradictory talking points can be confusing. I don’t know how $arah does it! Oh, right.

In any event, Rick Santorum, former protector of liberty from PA and current loser in VA, doesn’t think donors to the RNC would be happy if they knew their money was going to “this behavior”. Rick, if you’re planning on running for president in 2012, perhaps you should become acquainted with today’s GOP. A lesbian strip joint is pretty tame compared to sexting teens or toe-tapping in airport bathrooms. “Family Values” means different things these days. You’re just going to have to get with the times! Hypocrisy is IN!

Speaking of which, has anyone heard from Ted Haggard recently? Is he still totally not gay? If he’s not completely 100% straight by now, then ol’ “Santorum” Santorum is going to be DISGUSTED!

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