This Is Sure To End Well

Just when you thought gun nuts couldn’t get any nuttier, they decide that God’s House needs a little secular protection. The .45 caliber kind, to be exact! It’s actually becoming a struggle to keep up with the lunacy spouting out of various parts of the country but, I have to admit, this one stands out. I should mention that while I personally don’t have any desire to own a gun, I’m not completely adverse to other people having them. Much like drugs, alcohol and teen sex have shown, outright bans generally don’t do anything but increase the flow. I am in favor of strict regulation, however, and that is the complete opposite of what LA has just enacted.

In the story above, State Rep. Henry Burns (R) told TPM that he simply sees it as an acknowledgement that even churches aren’t safe in today’s Wild America. I wonder if anyone mentioned to him that the last time someone shot up a church, it was because the church was a nest of godless heathens, not because it was the good, god-fearing kind that I’m sure Burns is carrying water for. In any event, it’s his bizarre position on the limits of conceal carry that really stood out to me. The bill has a provision to prohibit guns in churches on college campuses and when he was asked about the double standard:

Burns said that bars, churches, schools and courthouses were some of the only places left in Louisiana where guns were prohibited. Some other states have enacted legislation to allow guns in bars, but for his part, Burns says, “I have no desire to try to put guns in bars and college campuses.”

So having the fundamentalist wackos that actually engage in domestic terrorism packing heat in what is ostensibly a place of peace is just fine, but letting the drunk frat boys have them is a step too far. If nutjobs are everywhere, how is the local watering hole or Kappa Delta going to be kept safe unless they’re allowed to have sidearms? You’ll notice that I’m attempting to follow the logic of a wingnut here, so that’s probably why it doesn’t make sense.

Regulation means keeping guns out of places like bars, schools and churches. That’s what I mean about regulation: buy all the guns you can fit in your pants and keep them there until they leave marks on your thighs for all I care. Since a lot of gun violence is relegated to homes that have guns, you’ll probably be doing the gene pool a favor. Just keep them out of my public spaces. Bullying by the NRA and even crazier people are pushing for an America where every citizen is armed to the teeth, which they claim will somehow reduce violence as opposed to becoming a Sergio Leone Western. I guess it’s related to the theory that lowering taxes increases revenue, but that’s another topic.

With all the good Christians locked and loaded, I can’t wait until LA gets around to immigration.


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