Archive for newt gingrich

Newt Loves Drug War, Wants Expansion

Posted in Politics with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 29, 2011 by rottenart

Obviously, since the deficit is the only thing anyone in DC wants to talk about, it makes sense for the new Republican frontrunner to come out in favor of expanding one of the biggest wastes of money in American history. And, since it is Newt after all, he’s also thrown in some hypocrisy on the issue, just for good measure.

Not only does he now think medical marijuana is a “joke” despite having supported it in 1981, he’d like to see more drug testing of citizens requesting unemployment compensation or food stamps.  He also supports the death penalty for high-level drug smugglers, noting the “successful” and “draconian” drug policies of Singapore. However, despite getting “more aggressive about drug policy” and emulating Singapore’s mandatory executions, he doesn’t want us to throw anyone in jail either.

Remember, folks, Gingrich is supposed to be the “ideas man” of the GOP


Let’s Get Up to Speed

Posted in Politics with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 16, 2011 by rottenart

It’s November, people. That means we have almost exactly one year until the elections of 2012.

“But Rottenart,” I  hear you ask, “between Occupying Everything and working three jobs, not to mention reading your numerous daily blog updates, how can I possibly know which loony tune GOP candidate to vote for in the upcoming primary? They’re all so equally crazy that it’s really difficult!”

Have no fear, dear readers! Follow me after the jump to take an in-depth look at the GOP field as it stands so you can become the informed voter our country needs, not the one our country deserves!

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The GOP “Debates”

Posted in Politics with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on October 19, 2011 by rottenart

I’ll start with a confession: I didn’t watch last night’s debate. Mostly because this is, what, the 27th in a  row now? Secondly, I already know about all the excitement. Lastly (and most importantly), I didn’t watch because there’s absolutely nothing more I could learn about the candidates to convince me that any of them is worth worrying about. Remember, we’re talking about the nomination of the 2011 Republican party. In a nutshell, that means no taxes, no regulations, no gays, no Mexicans and no poors. There, I just saved you having to watch the next one.

In fact, the only real reason to keep watching these things is to see which candidate flames out next. From Perry’s narcoleptic swagger to Bachmann’s twangy platitudes from outer space to Herman Cain’s SimCity tax plan, it’s hard to see how anyone takes them seriously. Romney, far and away the most electable, also comes off as just a clueless buffoon. Who doesn’t understand why expanding your manse while calling for foreclosures to continue (so they can be scooped up by investors, naturally!) is tone-deaf at best and utterly callous as worst?

The real takeaway is that the GOP field is populated much like a clown car. None of these candidates offers any real plans for American progress. Their messages are all predicated on ideas that have been tried for the last 30 years and have failed miserably. Their best hope is a chameleon who would be a staunch liberal if he had any core principles whatsoever. I’m not naive enough to believe that Obama will have an easy time next year but with this current crop of Republican jokers, it’s hard to see how he won’t.

Beyond Belief

Posted in Funny, Politics with tags , , , , , , , , , , on May 18, 2011 by rottenart

In watching Newt Gingrich’s behavior over the past couple of days, I’m reminded of this bit from Eddie Izzard:

I didn’t think anyone could be more entertaining than The Donald, but here we are.

Well, I’m Convinced

Posted in Politics with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , on March 9, 2011 by rottenart

Newt Gringrich, perennial political has-been, has been blathering on lately about finally getting around to running for president.  Assuming this is different than the other five thousand times he’s teased the country just to sell books, he is in a good position to pick up at least a chunk of the right-wing, evangelical, hypocritical, historical ignoramus vote. If you’ve been following the Republican party for, oh, about the past 30 years or so, you know that could be a primary winner.

Unfortunately for Newt, he’s got something of an image problem. It seems people think he’s something of a callous, cruel, heartless bastard who drops sick wives like old socks when a new, younger, hotter version comes along. That’s something voters could potentially let slide of course, but as David Frum puts it:

“Anyone can dump one sick wife. Gingrich dumped two.”

Pretty harsh. Add in the fact that he was committing said adultery while attempting to impeach the president for adultery and it starts to move over into absurdity. It doesn’t help that wife numero uno recently spoke with the media and let us in on Newt’s thought processes:

He asked her to just tolerate the affair, an offer she refused.

He’d just returned from Erie, Pennsylvania, where he’d given a speech full of high sentiments about compassion and family values.

The next night, they sat talking out on their back patio in Georgia. She said, “How do you give that speech and do what you’re doing?”

“It doesn’t matter what I do,” he answered. “People need to hear what I have to say. There’s no one else who can say what I can say. It doesn’t matter what I live.”

Pretty incredible that this doesn’t endear him to nation, right? But don’t fret, kids! Just as Newt’s enormous ego simply won’t allow him to believe that anyone cares that he live by his own words, he also has a reason for why he was such a prick: Patriotism (warning: link leads to CBN). He tells David Brody in the interview:

“There’s no question at times of my life, partially driven by how passionately I felt about this country, that I worked far too hard and things happened in my life that were not appropriate.”

It’s not his fault, guys! He just loves his country so much that he must cheat on his hospital-ridden wives! His only faults are that he works too hard and loves too much! Incidentally, it’s the same love of country that leads him to insult and demonize the president.

Obviously, Newt will be our next lord and ruler.



Such Short, Short Memories

Posted in Politics with tags , , , , , , , , , , , on August 31, 2010 by rottenart

Why in the world would conservatives be giddy about shutting down the government?

There are a lot of reasons why it would be a terrible idea, starting with the fact that government spending is the only thing keeping America afloat at the moment. Big Business is holding us hostage over the prospect of a tightened regulatory environment following the ACA  and Financial Reform and until Democrats figure out a way to entice them into hiring workers, federal funds are going to shore up state after state. Here in OK, a proposed Grand Prix deal was nixed by the city council, mostly because the city has already slashed its budget and can barely afford teachers, let alone pothole repair. In fact, many recent improvement projects have been finished on time only because of stimulus money. If the government shut down, those projects, along with similar projects across the country would come to a grinding halt.

But the practical implications of such a stunt notwithstanding, it’s unfathomable to me how Republicans can’t remember the outcome the last time they tried it.  Actually, some do, yet they seem to think it would be different this time around. The truth is, it’s liable to work out a lot worse for them now. Americans aren’t interested in a government that does nothing, despite what conservatives say.

Personally, I’d be tickled pink if the first thing a new Republican congress did was to codify their image as completely out of touch and bereft of ideas. Watching them effectively resolve to do nothing would be entertaining though likely catastrophic for the average American. In some ways, if the public were short-sighted enough to hand Republicans control after the past ten years, then I think they would deserve every calamity that might befall them. However, despite all the ranting, I am an optimist. I think the public remembers just how traumatic the Bush years were. I think they might even remember how good things were under Clinton’s watch and how childish Newt’s class of ’94 was for thinking a game of political chicken was what the country needed or wanted.

I’m pretty sure a majority of the American public remembers all that. The question is: why don’t the Republicans?

(cross-posted on

Catching the Cordoba Crazies

Posted in Politics with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on August 11, 2010 by rottenart

You may have heard by now that plans are afoot in NYC to build a 13 story Muslim community center two blocks away from the WTC site. The center, dubbed The Cordoba House, has been garnering predictable right-wing ire since it was announced. Our very own cookie monster, Newt Gingrich has made it a pet cause of sorts, imploring the United states to give up on its 1st Amendment freedom of religion and act a little more like Saudi Arabia. $arah Palin, noted non-New Yorker and shameless grifter, has also inserted herself into the fray by making up words and comparing herself to Shakespeare. And those are just the GOP’s leaders’ idiotic thoughts on the subject. We’ve also seen offensive 9/11 porn set to appear on NYC buses and a cringe-worthy ‘song‘ denouncing the center. Deducing from their subtle and informed reasoning, the xenophobes just aren’t that into a mosque in lower Manhattan.

Now, if it were simply a case of ignorant morons and craven political hacks lashing out at a major world religion, then I could sort of see the logic. Privileged white people have been hating on other, more colorful people for a long time and scapegoating all of our country’s ills on some foreign Other is practically a national pastime. I could even cut them a little slack for being so concerned about the sacred ground at Ground Zero, despite their outright disdain for NYC on the 364 days a year that aren’t 9/11. Yes, I’m willing to concede a lot when it comes to ignorant arguments as long as they’re somewhat consistent.

But… SURPRISE! The wingnuts can’t even seem to keep their hate on target unless it’s an election year (you all saw that coming, no doubt). You see, prior to Newt burning some calories trying to turn us into Theocracy-Land and $arah the fame-whore mangling the English language there was already a heathen house of worship four blocks from our national sacred construction pit! Of course this doesn’t count the large number of other mosques in NYC, or even in that other over-compensating symbol of American virility, The Pentagon, which also has a mosque. Why, it’s almost as if America is comprised at all levels of people with different faiths that simply want to practice their own particular brand of mumbo-jumbo in peace accordng to the freedom that we prattle on so much about.

Sadly, this is not the case in today’s Real America™, where we don’t care what religion you are as long as it’s the right one. Witness the waffling of NY Governor David Paterson, who offered to give state land to the Cordoba House’s organizers if they agree to build somewhere else, which is obviously the complete opposite of the 1st Amendment (the organizers refused the offer). NYC Mayor Mike Bloomberg, to his credit, delivered an intelligent speech on the need for inclusion and tolerance which, predictably, was completely passed over. Not only that, Cordoba Craziness seems to be turning into a pandemic, with opposition to proposed mosques across the country reaching fever pitch.

I think someone should explain slowly and carefully to these lemmings that this sort of anti-Muslim behavior is exactly how Al-Qaeda describes us to the Muslim World. Is it so crazy to think that we should be working to counter-act their image of us as at war with Islam instead of proving their point? Newt, $arah, and the rest of the mouth-breathers know very well that this sort of demagoguery is helpful in firing up their base; the problem is that it’s becoming harder and harder to tell their base from our ostensible enemies.